Last night was another big surprise. My mom called and said they wanted to visit for 4th of July to meet the baby. We never bothered asking them to come to visit because the last time we did was full of drama. We asked them to take off their shoes while they were here and they sent an email threatening not to come because they are 'not vegetarians and do not worship Indian culture' and if we wanted them to visit we had to accept them as they are, in a longer and angrier email than this. We said fine, wear your shoes, if shoes are more important than visiting your daughter. They did come in January 2008 and we all had a good time. But then K and I said to each other that we would never ask them to visit again - they could come if they wanted but we wouldn't ask. And if they didn't visit, we wouldn't go out of our way to visit them either. We've seen them twice since getting pregnant, and talked on the phone a few times, and have never said to them "When will you come to meet your grandchild?" They surprised us by asking to visit. Babies change things. It will be interesting to see how the next 18 years go.
Tonight we are having dinner with a friend who is separating from her husband. It's so sad. They were college sweethearts just like we are. They've been together for 19 years and they are only 40 years old. They have two kids that they adopted from Korea after years of struggling with infertility - a 12 year old girl and 9 year old boy. They are good people that always seem happy and like they are having fun together. We had no clue that they were having trouble. They came to our baby shower a few weeks ago as a family and we co-hosted an Arrested Development viewing party with both of them in January. Everything seemed normal. I guess you just never know. But tonight should be a sad one for sure.