Thanksgiving

We traveled to rural TN for a family reunion. 12 adults and 7 children under 5 sharing one house with four bedrooms and 1.5 baths. It was crowded, and loud, and lots of fun. It was my family (parents, sister & family, cousin & family, K & I) and another family we grew up with (parents, 2 daughters and their two families). Only my sister and my parents knew we were pregnant, supposedly. When we arrived, we started telling people, and they kept saying "I know!" It seems my mom spread the word. Everyone except my cousin, who seemed offended to be the last one to know. Not my fault! My parents were acting like they were excited for a new grandchild, which is good news. My mom's talking about making her traditional Christmas stocking for the new baby next Christmas and my dad's hugging me and asking if it's a boy or a girl.

I was/still am really sick with a cold. We woke up at 4am on Thursday and drove 7 hours to TN. I was exhausted and sick. I was tired and grumpy through Thanksgiving and went to bed at 8:30. But we were sleeping on an inflatable mattress on the floor. It was cold (heat rises) and uncomfortable and I couldn't breathe because of the cold. So I didn't sleep much, and spent much of the night crying because I couldn't sleep, and praying for morning. When my mom got up at 6am, I joined her. And I sat at the kitchen table in the dark with her, crying. And I cried on and off until around 2pm. It was so embarrassing. If that is the only experience my family sees of me as a pregnant woman, they are going to think I'm handling it really poorly, when actually, I think mostly in public I'm doing okay in general.

My parents threw me a surprise party on Friday for my 30th birthday, which is today. There was some confusion and we needed to go to Wal-mart* and my brother-in-law and dad were going to Wal-mart but wouldn't let us go with them. Actually, they were buying me a cake. We got back after they did and my dad came out to apologize, saying he didn't know we wanted to go and he would've come with us and I broke down and sobbed and told him not to worry I just couldn't stop crying today and this really wasn't that upsetting to me. He looked really uncomfortable. Then we walk inside, and all the kids jumped out and yelled surprise and I started crying again. It's seriously embarrassing! It was a nice surprise. I got some nice baby related presents. My parents gave me money to buy maternity clothes (we're going to Old Navy tonight to see what's available). My sister gave us a Winnie the Pooh bath set, rubber ducky included.

My four year old nephew is very confused about this baby. He told me that when the baby comes out of my belly, he will have a little sister. I said "Well, actually, a little cousin." Later, he put his hand on my stomach to touch the baby and said "This reminds me of when I was in my mom's belly and my dad put his hand on her belly to feel me." And I said "I'm sure the baby is happy its cousin is saying hi." And he said "But maybe the baby thinks I'm its brother." We'll leave this one up to my sister to sort out!

We finally feel included in my family. We are the very last people to have children. Now that we're pregnant, and there is a baby on the way, it's like we are real. People can relate to us. Maybe it tells them that we are normal after all, and that we just want what everyone else wants. Whatever it means, it's nice.

*We normally don't go to Wal-mart out of principle, but this is rural TN, and if you need something, you have to go to Wal-mart.