Monday, May 4, 2009

Emotional and in pain

Since Friday I have been full of raging hormones. I cry over everything. This weekend I cried because we don't know the name of our son if we have one, K wanted to get rid of a bowl she gave me when I started my job 6 years ago, my back hurt, I couldn't do much to help around the house, K takes such good care of me, and many tears that I couldn't even define (K asking "why are you crying?" my response "I don't know"). It's like the first trimester all over again, maybe worse. K is very supportive, which I cried about (a blubbery mess sobbing "you're so good to me, you take such good care of me").

For about two weeks I've been suffering from a back ache. I've done what I can to correct it (no more heels, sitting on a pillow in the car, sitting in only hard chairs or on the floor, no more sofas). All of this was helping for a while but starting Friday it just won't go away. I wake up okay but by midday I am in pain. On Friday we were at Borders buying a 'teach your baby French' CD and I couldn't take it. I was leaning on everything and I was grumpy. We came home and I burst in tears saying that I've put up with a lot in the last few months but this back ache is too much. Then Saturday we were cleaning the house and the back ache started again. I was lying on the floor crying about the pain. Laying down on my left side is the only thing that seems to relieve it. K basically told me not to do anything else and just to rest while she spring cleaned the bathroom (she hates to clean the bathroom so this was a really big deal). We were having our friend L over for dinner Saturday night and I was going to cook, but we decided to go out instead. Sunday all I did was rest, lying down, and the back ache was pretty minimal, though the emotions were strong, and I cried a lot, I think because I didn't do anything all day. Wow, I can't imagine what forced bed rest must do to you.

Now I'm back to work and already the back ache has begun. I just popped some Tylenol and I hope that gives me relief. I can't just lie down here like I've been doing at home all weekend. Maybe tomorrow I'll bring my heating pad.

On other notes, we did get our car seat installation and inspection done Saturday. Now we really are ready to have this baby. I'll be 38 weeks tomorrow. I'm in pain and crying constantly so sooner is better than later. Let's do this thing.

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